What This Not That

Gerard Butler~Now

Watch This…

London Has Fallen

London_Has_Fallen-600x321London Has Fallen is the sequel to 2013’s Olympus has Fallen, a witty action flick. Butler is a pretty awesome action star and has found a niche in being a bad ass. Movies like the Fallen series are perfect for his rugged charm and handsomeness. London has Fallen is a fun trill ride that allows you to escape from reality.

In this sequel, Banning is preparing for the birth of his baby, but his time off is interrupted by the death of the British Prime Minister. The president (Aaron Eckhart) is obliged to attend the funeral as well as some of the biggest political rulers of the modern world. Sounds too good for a terrorist to pass up doesn’t it? In fact, this has been staged and planned to a “T”. But there is one ripple in their plan: Banning.

Fallen is good because of several things, the first being that the movies take the characters on emotional roller coasters and leave them no time to be stale and static. Those are also two words that cannot be used for the movie. The movie continues to pack thrilling punch after punch with little time to rebound. Sprinkled humor and a great relationship between the main characters inject moments of respite from the onslaught of violence (they seem to be channeling Taken at this point). Do I care if it’s realistic? No, because action movies are meant as an escape.

There is a huge fault in the movie that does have to do with bad character development. Angel Basset continues her role as the head of the Secret Service but she shrinks from her former bad ass role. When the attacks on London starts, the writers turns her into a sniveling woman who has apparently forgotten how to shoot a gun. This is disgraceful to the character and to Basset.

London Has Fallen is thrilling fun like it’s predecessor. So grab some pop corn and get your ass in the theater.

…Not That

Gods of Egypt

Gods-of-egypt-summitIn the trailers, Gods of Egypt looks gods awful. It’s that kind of awful you can’t look away from. But the movie is surprising better than I thought. That is not to say it was good. It wasn’t good and it wasn’t bad. In fact, it reminded me of all the B movies of old that used stop motion. The movie looks good but has no substance.

The story follows Horus’s rise to power and destruction after his father passes Horus the throne. But uncle Set is angry at being passed over for the crown. In a coupe, he dis-eyes Horus and rules all Egypt This would be the end of the story except some young and stupid kid steals one of Horus’s eyes and in the process gets his girlfriend killed. He makes a deal with Horus: he gets the god the other eye and his girl friend will be brought back from the dead.

Gods of Egypt doesn’t take itself too seriously. That is why I think it attracted actors like Butler and Geoffrey Rush; it was fun to do. And you can tell Butler is living it up. Yelling in his bough as Caucasian as you please. And it seems like Nikolaj Coster-Waldau can never keep all his body parts in tact. The humor helps cover some of the less cohesive parts of the movie (quite a lot of it) leading to a few good laughs.

Over all, this is a rental to pass a stormy evening. Save the money for a ticket for London has Fallen.

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Ah, Oblivion

Oblivion’s biggest issue is that it takes material from every sci-fi/fantasy story ever told and does it poorly. Read on for a list of what happens in the movie and what did it better.*

SPOILERS

1. Redhead gets pissed off and causes destruction-Carrieoblivion_tom_cruise_poster
2. Man is confused about what memories are real and which one aren’t- Total Recall
3. Too long and steals from other source material -Avatar
4. Heroes dies but female gives birth to the hero’s baby-Terminator, Pirates of The Caribbean, Premonition
5. Promises a treat when mission is completed but it’s a lie-Portal
6. Tom Cruise plays a man of the future that has been lied to by the accepted normality and then they try to kill him when he rebels-Minority Report
7. Nikolaj Coster-Waldau is a good looking asshole-Game of Thrones
8. Computer tried to kill everyone-2001 A Space Odyssey
9. Heroes must battle clone of themselves-Resident Evil
10. A phrase is repeated and can manipulation people’s destruction -BioShock
11. People stored in goopy cells in an alien ship-The X-Files
12. Tatters of the Statue of Liberty in a waste land- Planet of the Apes
13. Morgan Freeman adds a coolness factor to a Tom Cruise Movie –War of the Worlds
14. Circular robots get ill with the human and try to kill them- Portal 2
15. Collects crappy human relics- The Little Mermaid
16. Hero falls in love with the clone of their true love- Aeon Flux
17. Spaceship chase through tight canyons- Star Wars
18. Movie is so slow that you miss nothing when you go to the bathroom- Twilight
19. Hero redeems himself for the human apocalypse by sacrificing his life- Dollhouse
20. Title- Elder Scrolls Oblivion

*This is not a comprehensive list. The movie was so boring I probably missed a bunch.