What This Not That

Gerard Butler~Now

Watch This…

London Has Fallen

London_Has_Fallen-600x321London Has Fallen is the sequel to 2013’s Olympus has Fallen, a witty action flick. Butler is a pretty awesome action star and has found a niche in being a bad ass. Movies like the Fallen series are perfect for his rugged charm and handsomeness. London has Fallen is a fun trill ride that allows you to escape from reality.

In this sequel, Banning is preparing for the birth of his baby, but his time off is interrupted by the death of the British Prime Minister. The president (Aaron Eckhart) is obliged to attend the funeral as well as some of the biggest political rulers of the modern world. Sounds too good for a terrorist to pass up doesn’t it? In fact, this has been staged and planned to a “T”. But there is one ripple in their plan: Banning.

Fallen is good because of several things, the first being that the movies take the characters on emotional roller coasters and leave them no time to be stale and static. Those are also two words that cannot be used for the movie. The movie continues to pack thrilling punch after punch with little time to rebound. Sprinkled humor and a great relationship between the main characters inject moments of respite from the onslaught of violence (they seem to be channeling Taken at this point). Do I care if it’s realistic? No, because action movies are meant as an escape.

There is a huge fault in the movie that does have to do with bad character development. Angel Basset continues her role as the head of the Secret Service but she shrinks from her former bad ass role. When the attacks on London starts, the writers turns her into a sniveling woman who has apparently forgotten how to shoot a gun. This is disgraceful to the character and to Basset.

London Has Fallen is thrilling fun like it’s predecessor. So grab some pop corn and get your ass in the theater.

…Not That

Gods of Egypt

Gods-of-egypt-summitIn the trailers, Gods of Egypt looks gods awful. It’s that kind of awful you can’t look away from. But the movie is surprising better than I thought. That is not to say it was good. It wasn’t good and it wasn’t bad. In fact, it reminded me of all the B movies of old that used stop motion. The movie looks good but has no substance.

The story follows Horus’s rise to power and destruction after his father passes Horus the throne. But uncle Set is angry at being passed over for the crown. In a coupe, he dis-eyes Horus and rules all Egypt This would be the end of the story except some young and stupid kid steals one of Horus’s eyes and in the process gets his girlfriend killed. He makes a deal with Horus: he gets the god the other eye and his girl friend will be brought back from the dead.

Gods of Egypt doesn’t take itself too seriously. That is why I think it attracted actors like Butler and Geoffrey Rush; it was fun to do. And you can tell Butler is living it up. Yelling in his bough as Caucasian as you please. And it seems like Nikolaj Coster-Waldau can never keep all his body parts in tact. The humor helps cover some of the less cohesive parts of the movie (quite a lot of it) leading to a few good laughs.

Over all, this is a rental to pass a stormy evening. Save the money for a ticket for London has Fallen.

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Dead vs dumb

For Valentines weekend two big movies opened at the box office. You had Deadpool for the comic fans and millennials and then you had Zoolander oft forgotten but still worth your time I made a deal with my movie going partner: I would go to Deadpool the opening weekend as long as I got to see Zoolander 2. Here’s how the two movie stood up to expectations.

Deadpool-Jump-GunDeadpool has slowly been building steam. I was unexcited for another mediocre super hero movie. I had read some of the title character’s comics and enjoyed it but that didn’t mean I was running to the theaters. But early review came in and people loved the movie. It was so hyped up even Bettie White gave her endorsement. So I got excited about the movie and, honestly, this was the worst thing I could have done.

Deadpool follows a non-super hero as he avenges himself and his overly erotic lady love. Wade Wilson starts off as a violent, jerky mercenary that is diagnosed with cancer. In an effort to prolong his life and be with the woman he loves, he takes a dangerous treatment option. But that treatment turns sinister and he is turned into a mutant with insane healing powers. The down sides? His skin has been ruined leaving him literally scarred for life. Wade then takes up the mantel Deadpool hiding his hideousness behind a flashy costume while taking down the man who has changed his life.

In the first two minutes, I was convinced this would be the nest Guardians of the Galaxy (the best modern comic hero movies). The opening titles poke fun at what has become the predictable formula of these movies. It’s meta presence is sprinkled through out the film with many reference to Wolverine and Hugh Jackman. This jokes are perfectly timed and not over done. But the ,movie degenerates as it goes along. Part is the lack of faith buy the studio. The movie features third string X-Men whose characters were flat and one delusional. But the biggest issue is that the movie tries too hard to break the mold. The movie was raunchy, yes, but there were times were it was just offensive for offensive’s sake; it didn’t propel the story it just hurt it.

But over all the movie performs well. Ryan Reynolds is perfectly cast and does his best work when playing off other characters. In fact, he is a better leading man than several other movie heroes including Ant-Man. A future film with Cable (or heck Hawkeye but we can’t move across studios now can we?) will make better use of this banter as a anti-buddy buddy flick. Now that would be perfection.

Speaking of buddy buddy movies,Zoolander 2 shows us what happens when two perfect idiots get together. I am not a big Ben Stiller fan, but the original was too perfect not to love. The movie was ridiculous and stayed ridiculous (in a good way). It knew how to push the envelope with out knocking it off. It was laugh after laugh even after multiple viewings. So when they announced a sequel I was nothing but excited. The trailers didn’t disappoint; it was still just as ridiculous. It was going to be a great laugh. The movie met those expectations and I was more please with it than I was with Deadpool.

After a tragic accidents kills his wife and has his son taken away from him, Derek Zoolander has sequestered himself away. His pity party is crashed by Billy Zane who tells him he has been grieving for long enough and it was time to get back to work so he could get his son back. He is reconnected with Hansel who can’t stand him because the accident left Hansel scarred and ruined his carrier. But the two must put aside their issues and get to the bottom of why media stars are being killed.

Zoolander beats out Bill Pullman’s character in Ruthless People as the stupidest human635907104884099048-ZL2-12177R being alive. And it’s funny because this is a pooling of various idiotic statement people have actually made. When humanity’s various stupidity is put into one person, its collectively hilarious and believable. But that is all that is realistic about this. Every other event and plot point is exaggerated with great glee. For a time you are taken out of the violence and seriousness of the real world and get a chance to laugh. Here fictional male models ironically due what models are suppose to do: transport you to another place weather it is the runway, the visions in a fashion designers mind, or to a world were there is someone more stupid than Donald Trump.

The two movie are so polar that is it hard to compare them especially at what is a better movie. Zoolander made me laugh more and gave me just what I was expected. Deadpool didn’t meet my expectation but gave me some glorious shots of Ryan’s Reynolds butt.